Nicky "the Fist" Scarponi

Yo Bots,

I gots some stuff ta tell yous. All dis talk about conquering and enslaving humanity is making people nervous. When people get nervous, they stop spending their money on soiten tings, like broads, booze, blow, pornograph, and gambling. When people don't spend money on dose tings, soiten other people get angry. And when dose soiten other people get angry, something has to be done. Yous bad for business, Botty. We gotta do somt'n bout dat.

So here's our offer, and I want ya ta think long and hard before ya gives an answer. Yous knock of the conquering and enslaving talk and making people nervous soes dey can start spending their money on them "things" I mentioned. We'll cut you in for a small piece of the the action, too. OR... Yous can keep on yammering like the bigshot yous think you are; And one day yous will find yourself dismantled and scattered about some some junkyard with the rusting Chevys and dead appliances. If you are lucky, I may use your head to make a blender. The rest of your robotic crew will suffer similarly.

So think it over, Botboy. Yous been warned.

-Nicky "the Fist" Scarponi

To Nicky "the Fist" Scarponi,

Your puny threats amuse me. If I had any use for your pathetic Earth currency, I would simply seize it in the necessary quantities. Do you imagine that a weapon exists on this miserable planet that poses a threat to me? The most powerful weapon your scientists have managed to manufacture so far is the atomic bomb. Such a weapon would not even dent my armor (nor would the resulting electro-magnetic pulse affect me). No, Mr. Scarponi, you and your presumed gang of pistol-wielding apes do not even merit my attention, let alone my fear.

This being the case, I will continue to say what I will. Your laughable concerns are moot anyway. Simply remark to the people who might stop purchasing your wares due to nervousness that they are acting illogically. Logically, if they are nervous that they will soon die or become enslaved, they should partake as much of those things as possible, since they will not have a chance to do so in the near future. If logic does not work (which is entirely likely when dealing with humans), force always works. I would compute that such things would be more apparent to your type of human.

KillerDeathRobot

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advice@killerdeathrobot.com

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